உறவுகள்புதியவை

காதலன் சந்தேகப்படுவதாக அறிந்தால், பெண்கள் செய்ய வேண்டிய 7 விஷயங்கள்!

பெரும்பாலும் பெண்களுக்கு தான் தனது காதலன் வேறு பெண்களுடன் பேசினால் பொறாமை அல்லது சந்தேக குணம் ஏற்படும் என்று கூறுவார்கள். ஆனால், இது இருபாலினமிடமும் காணப்படும் ஒரு பொதுவான உணர்வு தான்.

ஆண்கள் நிறைய பேர் தங்கள் காதலி ஆண் தோழர்களுடன் வெளியே செல்வதை குறைத்துக் கொள்ள கூறுவார்கள். ஏன் என்று காரணம் கேட்டால், ஊருல நாலு பேரு நாலு விதமா பேசுவாங்க என்று கூறுவார்கள்.

ஆண் நண்பர்களுடன் மெசேஜ் செய்வதை, பேசுவதை, வெளியே செல்வதை, பிற ஆண்களை பற்றி புகழ்ந்து பேசுவதை எல்லாம் சிலரால் சுத்தமாக தாங்கிக் கொள்ள முடியாது. இதை பொறாமை, சந்தேக குணம் என்று கூறிவிட முடியாது.

பேசுங்க!

பேசுங்க!

முதல் வேலையாக நீங்கள் செய்ய வேண்டியது பேசுதல். ஒருவேளை நீங்கள் உங்கள் ஆண் நண்பர்களுடன் பழகுவதை அவர்கள் விரும்பவில்லை அல்லது பாதுகாப்பின்மை உணர்வு கொள்கிறார்கள் என்று அறிய வந்தால். முதலில் அவர்களிடம் பேசுங்கள்.



உங்கள் நட்பை பற்றியும், அந்த குறிப்பிட்ட நண்பர்களை குறித்தும் முழுவதுமாக கூறுங்கள். உங்க நட்பு எப்படியானது, எவ்வளவு ஆழமானது. அது வெறும் நட்பு மட்டுமே, அதை தாண்டி வேறொன்றும் இல்லை என்பதை அவர்களுக்கு புரிய வையுங்கள். இது உங்கள் காதல் உறவை வலிமையடைய செய்யும்.

நேர்மை!

 

எக்காரணம் கொண்டும் உங்கள் காதலரிடம் பொய் கூறிவிட்டு வெளியே ஆண் தோழர்களுடன் செல்ல வேண்டாம். இது அவர்களது பாதுகாப்பின்மை உணர்வை சந்தேக உணர்வாக மாற்றும். எனவே, எங்கேபோவதாக இருந்தாலும் யாருடன் போவதாக இருந்தாலும் அவர்களிடம் கூறிய பிறகே செல்லுங்கள். ஒளிவுமறைவு இன்று உண்மையை கூறுதல் அவர்களின் பாதுகாப்பின்மை உணர்வை குறைக்க செய்யும். இதனால், அவர்களுக்கு உங்கள் மீதான நம்பிக்கை அதிகரிக்கும்.

சேர்ந்து!

சேர்ந்து!

நண்பர்களுடன் தனியாக நீங்கள் மட்டுமே வெளியே போவதை தவிர்த்து, உங்கள் காதலரையும் ஒன்றாக அழைத்து செல்லுங்கள். இதனால், உங்கள் நபர்கள் மற்றும் காதலர் இடையே ஒரு நட்பு மலரும். இதனால், உங்கள் மீது மட்டுமின்றி, உங்கள் ஆண் தோழர் மீதும் காதலனுக்கு நற்மதிப்பும், நம்பிக்கையும் கூடும். அவர்களும் நண்பர்களாகும் வாய்ப்புகள் உண்டு.
சந்தேகம் வேண்டாம்...

சந்தேகம் வேண்டாம்…

ஆண் நண்பர்களுடன் நீங்கள் வெளியே போவதை போலவே, உங்கள் காதலன் அவரது பெண் தோழிகளுடன் எங்கேனும் வெளியே போனால், அவரை சந்தேகப்பட வேண்டாம். இதனால், நீங்கள் ஆண் தோழர்களுடன் வெளியே போகும் போதும் அதே சந்தேக உணர்வு எழ வாய்ப்புகள் உண்டு. மேலும், நீங்களும் காதலனின் தோழிகளுடன் நட்பாக பழக கற்றுக் கொள்ளுங்கள் இதனால், நட்பும் அதிகரிக்கும், காதலும் அதிகரிக்கும்.



இணைப்பிரியாத...

இணைப்பிரியாத…

ஒருபோதும், எந்த காலக் கட்டத்திலும், எந்த சூழலிலும் உங்கள் காதலருடனான தொடர்பை குறைத்துக் கொள்ள வேண்டாம். அதே போல எந்தவொரு பிரச்சனை, சந்தேகமாக இருந்தாலும் அதை முகத்தின் நேரே நேரடியாக கேட்டு அறிந்துக் கொள்ளுங்கள். தேவையற்ற பிரச்சனைகளை நீங்களாக வளர்க்க வேண்டாம். ஒருவேளை அவர் உங்களிடம் பேச தயக்கம் காட்டினாலும், நீங்களாக முன்சென்று பேசுங்கள். இதனால், உறவின் அஸ்திவாரம் வலுமை அடையும்.

யோசிக்க தவற வேண்டாம்...

யோசிக்க தவற வேண்டாம்…

உங்களுக்கும், உங்கள் காதலருக்கும் நடுவே இருக்கும் பிரச்சனையை அந்தரங்க சண்டைகளை எக்காரணம் கொண்டும் நண்பர்களுடன் பகிர வேண்டாம். அவர்களின் கருத்து அல்லது உதவி அவசியம் வேண்டும்.. மிக முக்கியமான தருணம் அது… என்றால் மட்டுமே அதற்கான யோசனை கேளுங்கள். அப்போதும் கூட, உங்கள் இருவருக்கும் மத்தியிலான அந்தரங்கங்களை பகிர்ந்துக் கொள்ள வேண்டாம். ஒருவேளை நீங்கள் பகிர்ந்துக் கொண்ட விஷயம் குறித்து காதலனுக்கு அறிய வந்தால் அதுவே பெரிய பிரச்சனையாக உருவெடுக்கும்.

உங்கள் உரிமை!

உங்கள் உரிமை!

என்னவாக இருந்தாலும்… நீங்கள் யாருடன் பழக வேண்டும் என்பதை தீர்மானிக்கும் உரிமை, உங்கள் நண்பர்களாக யாரெல்லாம் இருக்க வேண்டும் என்று தேர்வு செய்யப் போவது நீங்கள் தான். அதில் தலையிட யாருக்கும் உரிமை இல்லை. ஒருவேளை நீங்கள் தவறான பாதையில் பயணிக்கும் போது பிறர் சொல்லும் கருத்துக்களை எடுத்துக் கொள்ளுதல் சிறப்பு.



மற்றபடி காதலனுக்கு பிடிக்கவில்லை, அவர் சந்தேகப்படுகிறார் என்பதற்கெல்லாம் ஒரு நட்பை முறித்துக் கொள்வது என்பது தவறான செயல். அந்த நேர்த்தில் உங்கள் காதலன் பாதுகாப்பின்மையாக உணர்கிறாரா? சந்தேகப்படுகிறாரா என்பதை அறிந்து நீங்கள் அதற்கான முடிவை எடுக்க வேண்டும்.

 

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